Newborns

Conventional wisdom would have first-time nervous mommies believe that taking care of a newborn is a lot of work. This is pretty much drilled into our psyche from the moment we pee on the stick. I will let you in on a little secret: With rare exception, it’s mostly untrue. Newborns are actually quite simple to care for . . . really, you just follow these basic steps:

Step 1: Make sure he or she is clean and dry.

Step 2: Nurse baby until milk drunk nirvana has been reached.

Step 3: Snuggle baby.

Almost without fail, he or she will fall asleep during Step 2 or 3. At that point, it’s up to you what to do next.

Step 4: (a) Continue snuggling, staring, and otherwise being in awe of baby. It is not unusual to want to do this for hours, and perfectly acceptable. (b) Put baby down in a safe spot to sleep while you eat, shower, sleep, or attempt productivity (although the latter is not recommended in the early weeks).

Repeat as needed for several months.

I suppose the “difficult” part is that newborns have no sense of time, and so sometimes you are repeating the steps hourly, and other times several hours may past. Expect this randomness to continue for a minimum of three months, maybe longer. Eventually, baby will start spacing feedings a bit more predictably, sleeping slightly longer intervals, and staying awake longer. Then you no longer have a “newborn” . . . you have a “baby” or an “infant” or whatever you’d like to refer to the little bugger as, and that's a whole new post.