10 April 2012

Top Ten {Tuesday}: Parenting Myths I Wish Would Go Away

Top Ten Tuesday at Many Little Blessings
Linking up again with Angie at Many Little Blessings.

Following are Ten Parenting-Related Falsehoods I really wish I would stop seeing in the media and hearing about from friends.

1. Breastfeeding is best. It's normal.

2. Circumcision is necessary for all baby boys. No major medical association recommends routine circumcision.

3. Attention can spoil a newborn. Pick up that baby and snuggle away.

4. Infants cry to manipulate their parents. Babies cry because it's the only way they have to communicate.

Nursing A on moving day . . . "still" healthy and normal
5. Breastfeeding beyond a certain arbitrary age is unnecessary or dangerous or weird. The health benefits do not magically expire.

6. One year and twenty pounds means time to face the car seat forward. Current recommendations can be found here.

7. If your child is fed, dry, and not ill, they don't "need" you at night. Comfort is a totally acceptable reason for a baby (or an older child, or a teenager) to want his parent accessible.

8. Dad must give a bottle (expressed milk or formula) to bond with the new baby. Since when is providing food the only way to foster a relationship?

9. Spanking is a form of discipline. Actually, spanking is a form of hitting.

10. Parents must demand respect from their children. If you have to "demand" it, you ain't got it.

What would you add to this list?


  1. Agree with no. 10 in particular. The only thing you get on demand is fear.

    The other one I'd like to add to your list is that children need to get ahead intellectually to keep up. FFS. Let them be children. They learn by playing at this age, not by flash cards and pressure to conform.

    1. Laughter this end! :D It stands for 'frustrated for sure', and if you believe that you'll buy this lovely gold watch. :D

  2. i disagree with no 9 i believe in spanking but lets just clear it up spanking and beating are two different things no child deserves to beating black and blue but a little tap on the bottom never killed anyone this world would be a better place if more parents actually parented instead of being thier child's friend and i demand respect from my kids because i cook i clean i bathe them i help them with school work i do everything from them so i demand respect i am mama!If a child grows to disrespect thier parents then what makes people think they are gonna respect some other adult. im just saying

    1. I completely agree with Queen89! I am sick of being compared to an abuser because I spat my child! I have never harmed my child. I use spatting as a last resort but reasoning with my two year old is next to impossible in some cases
      If you think you can do better you are welcome to come to my home and educate me in your vast wisdom. I love my son and you don't just get respect. You aren't born with that knowledge. How to respect your elders is taught. I am teaching this to my son and I earn it by loving him, feeding him, bathing him, sheltering him and clothing him.

    2. There has never been a single credible study EVER showing spanking to be an effective form of long-term discipline. Multiple studies have shown the opposite, however. Respect is "taught" like everything else: by being demonstrated, by setting a positive example. You simply cannot "earn" respect through force (physical or verbal). It doesn't even make any sense.

  3. I agree with every single item listed. Especially 9 and 10. If you spank and don't teach, you have done nothing but hit. If you spank and teach, the teaching is what is making the difference. You can teach without spanking and get *just* as far. Maybe farther since fear causes stress hormones that make it harder to learn. All that spanking/hitting is is a physical release for the adult. :-( As far as respect goes, I don't respect anyone I fear. I do not fear anyone I respect. If that is true for adults, and as adults we are *not* supposed to respect people we fear, why would we even want to teach our child that fear and respect are the same?

  4. Absolutely fantastic post. I nodded emphatically with each one.

  5. "Actually, spanking is a form of hitting." Yep! I giggled at that, but it's so true.

    1. Interesting that your comment on this just popped up. I *just* finished a draft for tomorrow's Top Ten {Tuesday} . . . literally, like a few seconds ago. It's all about spanking myths and truths.